laptopped:

imagine banana with any other vowel

bununu

benene

bonono

binini

bynyny

retiredjesus:

vodka-rivers:

retiredjesus:

i like tumblr because you don’t have to be attractive to get followers

you are jesus though to be fair

i had 12 followers, thanks to tumblr i have 12,000

sassyabrahamlincoln:

why is it called the “great” outdoors? its hot and there are bugs out there

accio-percabeth:

sketch-elf:

A muggle-born’s sibling sends them a howler in the middle of the school year and it arrives while they eat. When they open it, all it does is simply scream “WHAT TEAM?”. Nearly all the muggle-borns shout “WILDCATS!” before returning to their meal, leaving the pure-bloods in total confusion of what the hell they just witnessed.

I accept and fully support this headcanon

buying clothes that aren’t black is hard

abbygubler:

itssexualhour:

My parents are both pastors and once I was fucking this one dude who’s dad was the pastor of the rival church and he whispered ‘talk biblical to me’ so i started reciting Psalms  23 and we ended up getting into a competition of who could recite the most bible versus before they cummed

the fuck kind of romeo and juliet is this